Stories by tkepner

Fire-whiskey, a dare, three Unspeakable witches, a disagreement over the pronunciation of a set of runes, fire-whiskey, a wand, and a Sanskrit tongue-twister (and when you're drunk enough, everything is a tongue-twister). Harry ends up as Hedwig at end of Harry's First Year at Hogwarts.

Harry Potter, and the rest of Dumbledore's Army in his fifth year, use the Room of Requirement to get themselves a spaceship! The problems of a tiny island on Earth don't seem so important, anymore. Wizards in Space! What could possibly go wrong with that? Eventually, this will be a crossover with Stargate SG-1.

Harry Potter, after a beating by Dudley and friends — with the help of a real gang member — wishes he had somewhere safe to go, and starts crawling home. He ends up in Equestria. The young Cutie Mark Crusaders find him. A year later, an owl arrives with his Hogwarts' letter! Inspired by Dogger807's hilarious story, "Magic School Days," on FiMfiction.

NEW CONTENT! Not long after Harry is revealed as a Parselmouth in 2nd Year, a cynical Slytherin girl drags the surprised boy into closet. Later, fearing Harry has been cursed or poisoned, Hermione demands he tell her what happened. What she finds out fundamentally changes their relationship. Non-consensual & consensual sex, very much lemony. Definitely mature! HP/Hr, HP/various.

Death wants free of its Master and proposes sending Harry back in time to avoid the unnecessary deaths in fighting Voldemort. Harry readily accepts, thinking he'll start anew as a Firstie. Instead, Harry's soul, magic, and memories end up at the beginning of Second Year — in GILDEROY LOCKHART!

Observations about the Harry Potter Universe and ; i.e., Marriage Contracts, Lordships, Copyright, the billionaire Harry, and so forth.

Death Eaters expect a boy so Dumbledore hid Harry, temporarily, as a baby girl. Vernon makes it stick and pimps her out. Then her letter comes. Who IS this Harriet girl? What will Snape do? The people, scenes, and places are J.K. Rowling's, I own nothing. This is a dark story, with references to non-consensual & consensual sex. Not graphic. Various pairings. No M/slash